Saturday, October 01, 2005

Walk On The Water

Last night, I was reading my new release, Lambert's Code. I got my author copies in the mail yesterday and was really excited. How cool!

I always read the printed copy, so started it before Step, then read more before bed. Lambert's Code was a hard book to write, and I had anxiety attacks over it. So, I'm reading away, catching a few mistakes - mistakes to me - like why didn't I edit out that line? Or she asks that question three times in one page, why didn't I catch that?

I was so disappointed in myself. It's a good story, and moves pretty quick, but I kept thinking of how much better I could have done it. So, in the middle of the night, anxiety attack! Yep, I woke up SURE I couldn't finish The Country Princess or if I did, it would be blech! What was I thinking signing a contract with WestBow.

Talked to Tony and tried to go to sleep again, thinking of Jesus. But I didn't sleep well and kept thinking of what a horrible storyteller I am. When I finally got up around 9, I put on Kent Henry's Deep Worship CD and the first song is about walking on the water with Jesus.

Suddenly the words washed over me and I started to cry. Jesus was saying walk on the water with me, Rachel, but I started looking around at my circumstances, my limited ability and sank fast! Let me tell you! I felt Jesus extend His hand to me. I reached up and grab hold!

I know I'm going to have to work hard, and I can do that, but I can't do it when I'm anxious. Jesus is right, what will it gain me to worry or fret? Please pray for me if you think of it. Thanks!

My friend Chris Lynxwiler is about to have a trade book deal. Congrats, Chris! You deserve it!
Meanwhile, my optical mouse is on the fritz and that really irritates me, but it's a small annoyance.

Today, I'm working-writing, though the house needs vacuuming, and dusted if I looked close. But I won't.

Peace!

1 comment:

Heather Diane Tipton said...

"I started looking around at my circumstances, my limited ability and sank fast! Let me tell you! I felt Jesus extend His hand to me."

Man. I usually check your blog earlier in the day if I can help it. But I got side tracked all day. I just got through having a convo where it dawned on me that I'm scared to rewrite my ms... so this was timely. (I'm not kidding I just got through saying, "crap I'm scared to rewrite it aren't I?" not 5 minutes before I decided to check out your blog.

Praying for you Rachel. pray for me if you think of it.