The meetings began in our living room, stuffed with teens and young adults, the tangible and sensory presence of God filling our living room.
I remember being in tears within minutes of prayer starting, or inhaling the spicy fragrance of my King.
We moved to a down town church about a year later and met on Friday nights for over four years, hauling in sound equipment, setting up and tearing down. A lot of that falling on Hubby.
In the last year, we've been praying at a partner church and while we've matured to the point where one worship leader, alone, with three or four prayers, can hold a solid two hour meeting, prayers continuous with worship, God has not breathed on our venture as we first believed.
As the leaders, hubby, me and three others began to feel God shifting focus, and another leader in the area stepped forward with what he feels God is calling him to do.
Prayer is our aim, not ministry. We love Fire Dweller, but we are not tied to "it." We are only tied to the obedience of prayer in our city/county.
A dozen or more years ago, a handful of leaders sat around a rusty table at Teen Missions during our annual prayer retreat, talking about the Lord, what He's doing in this hour of history, and we said, "We're all in, we're going for Him, together."
We said it again a half dozen years ago. But as I looked around the table, my eyes watered. Only three remained from the first group of pledges. Some God moved on. Others only committed in the passion of the moment and were easily swayed off the path.
"I've been here before," I said, teary, "people pledging to follow Him to the end and only three remained. I'm on this mountain until the end. And many of you will say the same, here and now, but where will you be in a year, in two?"
Our good intentions to follow Him to the end often come up shallow despite our good intentions. It's the mundane, the day in and day out that prove our metal in Jesus.
Of those around the table the second time, there must have been a dozen plus, only four remain. Others not around the table have joined, but many who said, "Yes, we're on this mountain," couldn't endure.
The mountain isn't Fire Dweller. The mountain is prayer, gazing on the beauty of the Lord, beholding Him in His sanctuary.
So, we remain, waiting to see what God will doing next. I know in my heart of hearts that the six plus years of Fire Dweller were not in vain. I saw a picture in my mind's eye of all the fields we'd plowed. We labored to prepare for the planting. God will cause the rain and sun for growing.
Ministry, callings, paths we walk are often seasonal. If we never put away the plow, how will we plant? If we're always planting, how will we harvest?
Walking with God, partnering for His kingdom on earth as it is in heaven is labor, a joy, a partnership, but we must hold all things loosely. Our identity is not in ministry but in Him. Genesis 15:1.
Fire Dweller served the purpose of God. All those who came and prayed, who lead worship, who lit the candle and fanned the flame, even if for a moment, share in the reward. EVERYONE!
I love this Odysseus quote from Troy. "If they ever tell my story, let them say that I walked with giants. Men rise and fall like the winter wheat, but these names will never die. Let them say I lived in the time of Hector, tamer of horses. Let them say I lived in the time of Achilles."
As for me, if they ever tell my story, let them say I walked with giants. Let them say Iived in the time of Don Luszczewski, Javier LaBoy, Matt Collins, Ted Travers and Tony Hauck. Let them say we cried out for Jesus to visit our region and our nation. Let the say we broke up the fallow ground with plows and horses, and we believed for the planting and the rain. Let them say the harvest for the Lord was great."